Wedding pros! I'm looking for some guidance on this issue.  I have a bride who just can't seem to make a decision on ANYTHING.  I give her my professional advice on her questions/concerns (a few examples are what wedding colors to choose and should I include so-and-so in my bridal party), but she wants me to tell her what to do.  It's not my wedding!


Any advice/suggestions?

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Dear An elegant affair. It can happen in any kind of job. Also talking with friends they sometimes ask your advice. usually with these brides I put myself in their shoes and really imagine myself having the wedding. Do the best and encourage her to decide what is the best for you. WPlanner is a consultant, and most of the time has to decide what is best for their clients. If she sees you convinced she will agree with what you propose. Please do not say it's not my wedding, it is your wedding!

Fabrizio Mengasini
Thanks for you input/suggestions! I definitley would not say 'It's not my wedding!" to the bride, but I am screaming it on the inside! :-)
Excellent insight! Thanks so much Beth!
In our wedding planning studio, we have over 30 vendors in several categories. We're set up so brides can meet with vendors here and so vendors can display their work/marketing materials.We cap how many vendors can be in each category so that brides don't feel overwhelmed, like five photographers, three planners, two stationers, etc. We make sure that each vendor within a category offers a different niche.

So, with that said, present her with two options at a time. One that you feel like she will love, and another that you feel like she won't be so crazy about. Let her get her decisiveness flowing with this! Show pictures of everyone's work, because brides are very visual. Then you can start giving more options and not having to baby-step your way through the whole process. Sometimes they feel so overwhelmed that they can't imagine deciding on something else.

Make sure you have a talk with her about how you are so excited to really put her vision out there on the day-of and how much you like her style. Anything to boost her confidence in her choices. Hope this helps!
Hi StudioWed,

Yes this is a big help! Thanks for taking the time to respond!
There really are some people out there who just can not make a decision. Not everyone, just a few. I truly believe they want us to tell them what to do- I listen very carefully to all of their thoughts and ideas and slowly pull together what they are looking for based on what I heard. Listening and understanding is so important. Not every bride is indecisive but those that are need a lot of guidance. I worked with a bride yesterday who was all over the place and when I put together the 3 or 4 ideas I kept hearing about her invitations- she seemed relieved and thrilled.
Thanks Mara!
When a bride is indecisive about anything, we try to describe her choices to her in language that will allow her to instantly see what the correct choice is for her: i.e., this invitation is very urban and sophisticated and this one pulls in the garden theme you talked about.....This should be about what's right for this bride, not about what's the best choice for the planner....
Thanks Ellen!
It's not your wedding, that's right, but this bride sounds like she doesn't trust herself, so she trusts you. Make the decisions for her and be confident about them. You do know best and just because she can't make a decision, doesn't mean you can't. She obviously doesn't know what path to take, put her on the right path and you will see she will start making her on decisions.

The Bridal Babe
Thanks Bridal Babe! Excellent advice!
I always find that if a bride does not know what she likes, you can be sure she knows what she does not like, so this sometimes is a good starting point and the process of elimination can begin, you can quickly then pick up on her style.


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