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Your Wedding is approaching and there is a Family Feud! Ding Ding Ding!

Don't let this ruin your day or take your mind away from what's important. I suggest try separating the parties and remind them this is a day to celebrate. Let them know you are conscious of how passionate they are about this topic but ask if it can be ignored for just a few hours. We have heard it all "Both my parents and my fiance's parents are divorced and remarried" "Uncle George owes Jane Do money" People please enjoy your day and forget about the rest of the world! I have attended many wedding with Family Feuds and they turned out to be just fine - As a matter of a fact the feuding parties ended up letting bygones be bygones and everyone had a great time.

Has anyone gone through this experience or attended a wedding were there was a family feud and it turned out fine? Let's but the brides and groom's to be at Peace and let them know it's going to be alright! =)

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Permalink Reply by WeddingMediator on August 6, 2009 at 12:02pm

What I've learned is that most brides know when trouble might be brewing in their families over wedding issues. The time to sort things out is before the big day, and possibly with the guidance of someone familiar with handling highly charged emotions. It's hard to enjoy the day when it feels like a fist-fight could break out at any moment!

Here's what I'd recommend for anyone who wants to enjoy a drama-free wedding.

What's Your #1? Of course, you want a beautiful day, but what matters most to you? Having the entire family there? Making guests comfortable and happy? Feeling calm and joyful on that day? Avoiding any issues altogether? All good things, yes, but what your top goal? Knowing that can be your 'measuring stick' for other issues. 'Will X make me more or less calm and happy on my wedding day?' Then make sure everybody else involved knows your goal, too.
Give, Give, Get Sure, a wedding is your time to shine, however, a little giving can get you a drama-free day. Give the person(s) involved time and space to have their say about the issue or problem. Give that person your full attention and best listening skills when you meet to discuss things. Ask clarifying questions to learn more and begin to understand his or her perspective. That's a huge gift because rarely in today's rushed world is there time to sit and talk meaningfully. Once you've given your time, attention and care to the other person, you'll be able to Get her or him to listen to you and learn what matters most to you. Compassion and empathy are infectious- they spread quickly.
Think Positively! Did you know that emotions are 'catchable'? Your emotions can influence others to feel similarly. (Ever notice how you feel good when you see someone else laughing?) So, enter any difficult conversation with a positive, can-do attitude. Your openness and kindness could turn a bad situation around.

And, remember no one can make you unhappy without your permission, to paraphrase Eleanor Roosevelt. You can decide to be happy and enjoy your big day no matter what!

Hope that helps! Love=Fun! Dina

Dina Eisenberg
Positively Wed
Insightful Solutions to Wedding Woes

*stay tuned my site, PositivelyWed.com, launches soon.