Here are some words of wisdom from the American Academy of Wedding Professionals.

Copyright 2009 Deborah McCoy, all rights reserved.

Today we'd like to talk to you about the right way to ask for gifts. After all, we know it's impolite to include registry information in an engagement party, shower, or wedding invitations. and what's worse is to ask for cash!

The reasoning is this: You cannot dictate to your guests the type of gifts you'd like to have. and it's not up to you to tell them where to purchase them. And to ask for cash is the ultimate faux pas especially when your wedding invitation only asks your guests for ".the honour of their presence." and that's not spelled P-R-E-S-E-N-T-S.

So how do you solve the problem? Spread your registry information through the grapevine. Tell your family and bridal party to spread the word. and use the Internet to your advantage. Most couples have wedding websites to provide information to their guests and family members concerning all pre-wedding festivities and parties, etc. Putting your wedding registry information on your website for your guests to access is perfectly appropriate.

When it comes to showers, your hosts can be a little pushier. Maybe you'd like to go to the Caribbean on your honeymoon so your maid of honor throws a Caribbean Honeymoon Shower. When guests call to inquire, the MOH will say, "Sue and Bob really want a Caribbean honeymoon so I thought I'd help them out a bit. Bring a gift they can take with them and if you can't think of anything, greenbacks will do : -)."

Although the bride and groom may never ask guests for cash, the guests may ask your family and friends and bridal parties what you'd like to have and in this case, it's OK to tell them.

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